2:30AM

oh, just how i wish i have someone right now, to pour out everything that's in me, to literally empty myself from all the bottled up feelings, and the many burdens i carry on my shoulders; and to just share how nothing's been good to me, and how i've been so so so tired lately.

here's to the best mum ever

Hi there again since the last post in MARCH. I really wonder how most people who blog can keep their space updated so regularly, even with their busy lives like school, work, school, work.....and I can be gone for like what, 2 months with no updates?? Hahahah or nahhh, maybe I'm just really lazy. So anyways, here's my 4th post since the time I created this space.

Dedicating it to the greatest, awesomest, bestest mum in the world, if bestest is even a legit word to use. Or maybe I'll just go with the very best of the best mum.

my huge arm totally no chill :-(

✿ Here's to the mum who brought me into this beautiful world.
✿ Here's to the strongest mum.
✿ Here's to the ALL IN ONE mum.

✿ Here's to the mum who would give up her life or rather gave up her life, for my brothers and I.

✿ Here's to the mum who's always there for us.

✿ Here's to the mum who singlehandedly bring 4 difficult children up.

✿ Here's to the mum who taught, and still teaching me how to grow.

✿ Here's to the mum who cooks better than any chefs in this world.

✿ Here's to the mum who gives an assurance I'd always have someone to count on ANY time.
✿ Here's to the mum who brings me for facial/nail pampering and pays for them.
✿ Here's to the mum who wouldn't allow her kids to go to bed with empty stomach.
✿ Here's to the mum who goes out for late night movies and suppers with her kids.
✿ Here's to the mum who would do anything or everything just to protect her children and keep them happy, even if it means to sacrifice her own happiness.

Dearest mummy,

Thank You.

Whether or not are you reading it from here, it doesn't quite matter. Because what's written on the card given to you has got so much more. But I am writing in here as well, just to tell the world too, how great you are. How you spent literally half of your life all on me, the 2 korkor and Tommy (youngest brother). How you've been through so much yet still stay so so strong, just for the sake of the 4 of us. Thank you for all that you've done for us 4 and for always being there for us any time when we needed you to (or not), even when we've failed you so many times. Thank you for being my alarm clock every morning, even when it frustrates you so much trying to wake a bum. Thank you for your so kind and patient love towards me. You're the greatest all-in-one mum and nobody can ever replace the very special place you have in my heart. Thank you for being so understanding, and always there to give good (real) advices. Though at times we may bicker over the stupidest things, sulk and not talk to each other for several days, I know that you're most of the time right; not always but most of the time. :p deep down I know that all your naggings are for my good. I am really so so blessed to have you. I wouldn't be here and who I am today if it weren't for you; your teachings, scoldings, canings at young (lol), groundings and setting of boundaries (as much as I hate all of them so much). I have still so much to learn in life and I'm glad you'd always be here to lead me through this road, with God. I love you very very much mum, and know that I'll always have your back too. Happy Mother's Day!!!

Love, Tanya

a good for nothing

I'm pretty sure everyone had been criticised before at least once in their life by someone, be it parents, siblings, friends, teachers or a superior at work, one way or another. And nobody would ever say it's a good feeling. Nobody. But how does it feel like when it's someone so close and so dear to you, the person whom you thought has always and would always be your "shelter", criticises and hurts you so much with just the words said? I think it's worse than just "not a good feeling". It doesn't even matter if it was all because of that split second of anger that caused those hurtful words to spill out. Words hurt.

“ The whole world can turn their backs against me. And they can criticise and say bad behind my back or even to my face, for all I care. But you must not. For what I care about most, is you. And your opinion of me, your love for me, and I hope that you'd always and never stop believing in me. ”

It really feels nothing at all when any other human beings call me names and try to hurt me so much verbally but when it's from that someone, I feel the pinch in me.... It's like worse than a stab in the heart or a cut, and left there to bleed till dry.

Because you matter. You may think they are just a bunch of stupid meaningless words you use out of anger, but they can play with minds. And it just felt like everyone in the world thinks the same of me and that I am, a good for nothing.

V-Day!

Hey there again! Took me a solid month to publish this. LOL. So much for "will be blogging about Valentine's Day in my next post, VERY VERY VERY SOON" at the end of my previous post. So sorry really busy!! Got all the dates messed up in my blog? Like er, this post supposed to be in Feb archive? Hahahaha, ok whatever...

weheartit

Pretty gowns and dazzling high heels, exquisite suit, tie and dress pants, fine dining, sweet treats, big bouquet of roses, boxes of chocolates, and er teddy bears? Who needs all of those when I got you?

Anyway, what is 14 February? To appreciate your loved ones? Human, you should be appreciating them EVERY SINGLE DAY. I think "special days" like Valentine's Day, Mother's Day, Father's Day, Brother's Day, Sister's Day, Pet's Day, Granny's Day, Grandpa's Day, Friendship Day, Best-Friendship Day, you-name-them Day are SO LAME, really. It actually makes one who doesn't have any partner or kin feel sadder and more "alone", to see everyone celebrating the "special day" but not them. My heart goes out to them all. Jesus is and will always be with you.

 

Hao and I celebrated this Valentine's Day pretty well. We decided to do something different this year to celebrate it with 2 other friends. Hehe. I think double dates are quite cute. LOL. Thank you so much you 3, for one of the bests and most fun Valentine's Day!

Probably no one thought of celebrating Valentine's Day in USS, it wasn't so crowded! Just tourists, tourists, a few Singaporeans and more tourists, it felt like we were not in SG. Hahaha.

Express passes weren't even needed. We secretly laughed at people who actually threw $50 to get it, yet still entering the rides the same time as we did! Pretty upset tho, the Battlestar Galactica ride's still not opened.

neck folds totally no chill!!!

We repeated the Mummy ride several times trying to get a perfect shot down the coaster but nope..... Then got sick of it HAHAHA but it's one of the best rides, I must say. Definitely NOT forgetting Transformers. I think that comes in 2nd best ride in USS, Battlestar being the 1st (duh!).

BEST SNACK IN USS which costs only sgd$3 (or 4, i forgot....)

Spent about 7 hours in the amusement park, I don't know about the rest but it was actually really tiring for me that day, no joke. Because 4 of us got back really late the night before, celebrating Fransisca's birthday. And I got injured at the elbow trying to climb the stupid props for this damn 那些年 (nà xiē nián) picture, which turned out so nice. Hahaha. We really had nothing better to do while waiting for the fireworks show...

so fluffy we gonna die!!!

After all that, we had Burger King for dinner at Vivo City! So much love for the double Mushroom Swiss burger, that is literally the ONLY BURGER I would have every time I visit BK. Nothing else. I am such a boring person. Ahaha! Then before all the shops started closing at 9:30/10+, just us being girls, Eugenia and I did a little shopping and I bought stupid things which today, I think I just threw $34 away for nothing??? It's left somewhere in my room now collecting dust, and nope not gonna tell you what it is.......

And yep I did up a vlog on my Valentine's Day! :-)

Oh! Hmmm, and the gifts I got! Not forgetting the gifts I got. Hehe.

The best boyfriend got me this flowers (yes they are real!)

So so so pretty, and smells really good too! They are not artificial, tho it looks like.

They are real preserved flowers that could last up to a year, kept away from sunlight and water. How interesting huh, the total opposite of keeping flowers alive.

And the greatest mum got me this super pretty clutch from Victoria's Secret, which I used for CNY. Hehe, so apt. Love it, and love you more mum! ♡

Yep, so that's about all. Really thank God so much for all this loving people around me, every single one of them, especially my family who's always so supportive of me in every single thing.

Thanks for reading! Till next time!

Xx,

Tanya

Hello twenty!

*screams excitedly* I am finally in the twenties gang! lol. THIS IS SUCH A LATE POST oh my goodness. I am actually supposed to blog about my valentine's day (not gonna blog about cny because there's really nothing much) already but no???? Hate how busy and how much of a procrastinator I am pfftt. Alright, really not sure to say if this year ahead excites or scares me I don't know hahahah. Already cannot wait for my 21st lul.
But anyways, I had a really really great birthday this year. Really cannot emphasize more on how amazing my boyfriend is. He may be so dumb sometimes  (I'm sorry if you're reading this baby, but dumb in a cute way ok hahahah) but the number of amazing ideas he got to surprise me on special occasions really causes me to be in awe. I cannot hit up to your level baby, you should be so proud of yourself??? HAHAH

probably all tired from the planning he needs to catch some sleep for awhile LOL

I WENT SKY-DINING FOR THE FIRST TIME *screams*!! I can still vividly remember how amazing, I think amazing has got to be the best word to use in this post already, how amazing it felt to be seated facing the wonderful boyfriend, semi-fine dining in the sky. The food was great, the weather, the atmosphere, everything. My night that day was so (again), AMAZING.

Though I kinda messed it up a little at start? So guilty brrr. OK, because my birthday this year fell on a Monday so the boyfriend arranged to celebrate it on Sunday instead (though I took leave away from work on Monday hahahah). That way, he could countdown to my birthday with me too!!! Such a sweetie. Back to what I was trying to say, yep I felt bad because I went to do my hair before dinner, not knowing that dinner was supposed to be at 6:30pm? This smart boyfriend also forgot to inform me the day before or earlier that day at least?? So funny lol :-(

hello hehe

So instead of dinner starting at 6:30PM, where we could have experienced the full sunset as well (BIG SIGH), but hey thank God we still managed to catch a glimpse of it before the sun fully set... We took a cab after my hairdo, got there about 7:15PM instead and started dinner at 7:30PM.

I looked so tired?? lul I actually really was. HAhaHa

super beautiful view

Which later got me kind of sad because it got so dark I couldn't take nice photos up there. Hahahah :-(

We were served with champagnes before we got up the cable car. So cool! But I am not much of an alcohol person, I only took a sip of it.

if you're reading this sir, why do you not look happy here???

Menu:

Appetiser - Smoked Duck with Salad sides

Soup - Mushroom Soup with 1 Prawn Wanton

Main - Salmon with Mashed Potato / Beef Steak with Mashed Potato

Desserts - Raspberry Mousse Chocolate Cake with Mixed Berries sides

Drinks - Champagne / White Wine / Iced Water / Hot Tea and/or Coffee

Super good food! I had the Salmon with Mashed Potato for the main and the appetisers were like what?? 4 big chunky pieces of smoked duck??! God, that's heaven on earth really. Ok, I might be a little too exaggerating here but it was really good. Haha.

The photos doesn't even do justice to the food because

1. It was so dark

2. I really couldn't be bothered to take nice photos because it was so dark

3. I actually had to rush on my food??

Okay, maybe #3 was the only lame thing I thought about this. The cable car only goes 2 rounds (approx. ½ hour per round), which means you only have about an hour to finish that much of food?? Though we both managed to, leaving the drinks not all drank, I didn't really get to enjoy my meal because of the rush of time. Yes, I am quite a slow eater. :-(

On a brighter note, the view from the cable car was AMAZING.

my love

so bloated really, my stomach was bulging out after dinner HAHAhahHa

And they had this decorated pillar at the entrance there, it was so cute we tried to literally "be high on happiness" heheh

Then I went to the toilet after that and spent like 15 minutes in there because, even the toilet's so nice???? Hahahahahahah

Thereafter, took the cable car again down to Harbourfront and walked to Vivo City to catch a movie.

Yes,

American Sniper is a really good movie.

The movie fortunately ended before the clock struck 12 so we walked over to the Sentosa Boardwalk, sat there, watched 3 stars in the sky, talked and he wished me a happy birthday at 00:00.

Yep my boyfriend makes the weirdest (cutest) faces EVER

(I just HAD TO)

Okay so since 1^st Feb (evening) was celebrated so well, my actual birthday was pretty simple. I woke up feeling so so blessed, prepped myself and headed out to meet the best boyfriend. I was as usual late like shit. Showered too quickly and got soap in my eye. Well done Tanya. Went out with a 1 sided red eye but it was gone after a while, Thank God.

sudden major love for rings

I cabbed over to his place and was surprised with a card, a rainbow rose, a balloon and the Charles & Keith bracelet, though not the one I've been eyeing on because it was out of stock :-(, but still is so pretty!! Love it! Wasn't even expecting more presents or anything else anymore because the sky dining was amazing enough and must have already cost a bomb!

It was a Monday so I thought being a Smurfette would be cool, though it was far from Monday blues. Hehe.

So we decided that since we were heading to town, I wouldn't carry the balloon around, I wrote 10 wishes on it and let it flew up the sky.

lol sorry if you got vertical video syndrome :-(

Cabbed to town and tried to do some CNY shopping but everywhere was so crowded and got nothing in the end, except this white top from MDS, so nice so comfortable, which was not even for CNY. Hahahahah

?!?!

locate our feet guys

!!!GIVE ME UR EYEBROWS!!!

Met the greatest family in the evening for dinner at Kiseki Japanese Buffet Restaurant. I love Jap food so much, I choose Jap restaurant every year for my birthday. So much so that my dad asked “why dine here again?” thinking that it was the same restaurant as last year’s (which was at Sumiya), because both are located in Orchard Central.

Yep, not many food photos because I really couldn't be bothered to take photos of FOOD.

here's to those who love sashimi??
i don't get how i love jap food so much but do not like this lol.

check out that heaps of ABALONE!!!

hm the oreo cheesecake was good hehe

i look like a giant...*cries very sad tears*

Yay to my fav cake of all time from Cedele!

--- ---

And ending off this post with.......just kidding, I forgot to mention at start that this would be a superrrrr long post because it’s a 2-in-1 LoLoLLOLollll, I'm so irritating heheh. Read on only if you can tahan my face, because lots of pics below....-hashtag sorry not sorry-

So on 31^st Jan before my actual birthday, my secondary school babes and I decided to meet (because we haven’t seen each other for months already???) for some picnic time!!! And yep, to surprise me and celebrate my birthday in advance! which I rly rly totes did not know about, hehe :-)

Such great weather that day. Thank you Jesus.

this is for you jahan, for being irritating 80% of the time luv u

 

and cute moments of Ezzy trying to kiss me whut

Mean human beings left me out in the photos because I was adjusting the phone cam for a self timed group photo?!?!?! :-(  I feel the love....

(oh, double chin yalllll BEAT THAT)

not even kidding, we literally did nothing that day but took gazillion of photos, and laugh, and eat, and laugh more. HAHAHA

Then yep here came the surprise with this SUPER CUTE BROWNIE from P.Osh, so so much love for it couldn't even bear to cut, destroy the art and eat it :-(

 ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡

 

Thank you so much you guys, really...!

major love for this shot!!!

 

Then Nabilah's boyfriend swing by to pick her up. So we decided to use him as our photographer hehe......

creds: Amirul

---

So so much fun.

To many many more days like this :-)

here's to the best friend ever, Pola Ezra

Then we got to see the sunset :-)

Too many photos? Maybe.

But nope, would never be sorry for that!!

I will be blogging about Valentine's Day in my next post, very very very soon.

:-)

Till then,

Ciao!!